two weeks gone

my come hadn't even dried on your lips
before you buried your face in her barely there hips

thought you could have your cake and eat it too
but now I know, and you'll never taste me again

you've shown your true colors now
it saddens me to see what you have become

you claimed I wasn't hard enough for you,
now it's clear you weren't man enough for me

it takes some kind of woman to still stand strong
after being betrayed and lied to for so long

you pride yourself on your compassion
where was that when you allowed this to go on

you knew my knowing would change it all
but "protecting" me from truth wasn't your call

perhaps I was the foolish one,
the you I thought I knew wouldn't do this

love and relationships

Sometimes in our relentless effort to find the person we love, we fail to recognize and appreciate the people who love us. We miss out on so many beautiful things simply because we allow ourselves to be enslaved by our own selfish concerns. Go for the man of deeds and not for the man of words, for you will find rewarding happiness, not with the man you love but with the man who loves you more. The best lovers are those capable of loving from a distance far enough to allow the person to grow but ever too far to feel the love within your being.

To let go of someone doesn’t mean you have to stop loving, it only means that you allow that person to find his own happiness without expecting him to come back. Letting go is not just setting the other person free, but is also setting yourself free from all the bitterness, hatred, and anger that you keep in your heart. Do not let the bitterness take away your strength and weaken your faith, and never allow pain to dishearten you; but rather let yourself grow with wisdom in bearing it.

You may find peace in loving someone from a distance not expecting something in return. But be careful, for this can sustain life but can never give enough room for us to grow. We can all survive with just beautiful memories of the past, but real peace and happiness come only with open acceptance of what reality is today. There comes a time in our lives when we chance upon someone so nice and beautiful and we just find ourselves so intensely attracted to that person. This feeling soon becomes a part of our everyday lives and eventually consumes our thoughts and actions. The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that this person feels nothing more for us than just a friendship.

We start our desperate attempt to get noticed and be closer, but in the end our efforts are still unrewarded and we end up being sorry for ourselves.

You don’t have to forget someone you love. What you need to learn is how to accept the verdict of reality without being bitter or sorry for yourself. Believe me, you would be better off giving that dedication and love to someone more deserving.

Don’t let your heart run your life, be sensible and let your mind speak for itself.

Listen not only to your feelings but to reason as well. Always remember that if you lose someone today, it means that someone better is coming tomorrow. If you lose love that doesn’t mean you failed in love.

Cry if you have to, but make sure that tears wash away the hurt and the bitterness that the past has left with you. Let go of yesterday and love will find its way back to you. And when it does, pray that it may be the love that will stay and last a lifetime.

There are two ways to live your life: One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.

There is no mistake so painful that love cannot forgive. No past so bitter that love cannot accept and no love so little that we cannot start all over with.

- Albert Einstein

liar, liar pants on fire...

I get how some people lie on a job interview, or to finagle their way into getting something...stretching the truth if you will. Not that I think that's particularly right. But it happens.

But lying to someone's face who you supposedly respect and value? Not to mention during a conversation in which you are purging yourself of a truth you have withheld for far too long. Who would do this? And why would anyone put up with it.

I am a forgiving person, I don't hold grudges. And I forgive you. It doesn't mean I have to be friends with you anymore. Why would I do that to myself when I have plenty of people out there who DO respect me and value my friendship?

Fool me once, shame on you...fool me twice? I don't think so.

Note to Self

I just found a note to myself in my desk: "getting human beings to value and respect nature, animals, and other human beings."

I am pretty sure that I wrote this when I was thinking about what was most important to me in life, and what I am passionate about. It's very true. My "new year's resolution" for this year was to find my passion in life and pursue it with all of my being. Well, there you go. My other passion is to create things.

I want to marry these two ideals. I think it's possible. Now that I know what my passion is - it's the first step.

why are you doing this to me?

My body just doesn't like certain things right now. And seeing certain people's names in a sentence as a 1+1 is definitely not something my body is liking. No matter how much my brain, my heart, my logic tell me c'est la vie......

It still makes me feel physically ill to see them together even when it's just their names typed out on a screen. How on earth could I possibly see them in public?

letting go

I know I need to let go, but I am so lost as to how to do it. Perhaps you just let go over time, and there is nothing you can DO to speed up that process.

It's easy for me to tell people not to over think things and dwell on stuff in their lives that they cannot change or have no control over. I seem to KNOW this for myself, but have the worst trouble following that advice myself. Isn't that always the way?

So how do I go about doing that?